“Pain is your best friend. It is infinitely more honest with you than pleasure. Despite what you might think, the painful experiences you have had benefit you far more than the pleasurable ones, even though most of us spend our lives trying to duck and hide from them.
But when you can center yourself and be open to look pain dead in the eye, then you have transcended the limits of your ego and this humanity. It is then that you enter into the possibility of becoming a great being.”
~ Swami Chetanananda
When I first read these words I wanted to reject them. How could pain be my best friend?
Yet, looking back on the painful, challenging and disappointing experiences in my life, I understand.
Through dark times we find courage and resourcefulness that we may not have thought we had within us.
We break open and feel into what matters.
We learn about ourselves and grow as human beings.
We are able to see the pain in others and feel more connected to them.
We enter the possibility of becoming great beings.
… and knowing this helps.
Namaste
Namaste Val Boyko,
This is Sachin from India. It feels great reading your post.
Love,
https://sachindhiraj.wordpress.com
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Namaste Sachin. Thank you for stopping by 🙏
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“We are able to see the pain in others and feel more connected to them.”
I think that’s the best part of the lesson.
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I like that too Dan. Thought-provoking post, Val. ♡
Diana xo
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Thanks Diana 💛
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Agreed 💛 thank you Dan
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Yes, this is very true Val, its not until later in hindsight we begin to see this, and I have now become grateful for those times of painful darkness, for it was only through overcoming them, that I am who I am today..
Wonderful inspiration..
Sending Love, and Light dear Val.. And thank you
Sue 💜
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Thank you dear Sue for your warmth and kindness. When we reflect on the past, there are many treasures waiting to be revealed. 💛🙏💛
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Wonderful.
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Thank you 💛
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Anytime
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So true. So painfully true!
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Thank you Kate for sharing your truth 😊
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You’re right, it does help, Val. 🙂
As you may already well know, suffering (‘Dukkha’), which is not pain per se but its correlate ‘suffering’ or ‘unsatisfactoriness’ is said in Orthodox Buddhism to be one of just three gateways to liberation; the other two being knowledge of impermanence (‘Anicca’) and non-self (‘Anatta’).
H ❤
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Thank you dear Hariod for adding insight and depth to this.💛 No matter where we are along the path, we all share the experience of feeling pain. My experience has been that our awareness of suffering grows as our ignorance (avidya) lessens. I haven’t studied Buddhism, but there are many parallels in yoga philosophy. 🙏
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Pain CAN be a teacher, but we have to CHOOSE to learn from it, then let it go . . .
For example, when we bruise our egos, we often slow down (or halt) the healing process by picking at the wound, adding to our pain, and creating unnecessary suffering:
We analyze what happened.
We turn it over in our minds.
We tell other people what happened.
We solicit their opinions.
We gather support for Ego’s view of the situation.
We get mad/sad all over again.
We may desire retribution.
In extreme cases, we may plot our revenge . . .
Does all this ego-maneuvering and posturing teach us anything?
Not necessarily.
When we hang on to the pain of negative emotions (hurt, frustration, anger, sadness, or grief), we can aggravate the impact of the initial injury by letting it and the accompanying pain eclipse everything else in our lives. We can get stuck for days, weeks, months, and even years, watching the same stale re-runs over and over, instead of choosing to move forward . . . while learning from the pain.
And if we choose to hang on to the pain, rather than letting it go, we rob ourselves of the joy, peace, and happiness we could be feeling right here, right now.
Namaste.
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Good point Nancy! Thank you for bringing in how we can choose to deal with pain. 💛 Clinging to the pain and picking at the wound prevents the healing. As long as we hang on to the resisting what has happened, our suffering will continue.
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Such truth in this. It took many of us a lifetime to understand, but yet…so much truth.
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That’s true it’s during our pain that we start looking carefully at what we say so we don’t hurt peoples feelings and we learn and try new things so we can heal ourselves
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Thank you 💛
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It really is the silver lining. It is the kind gift that you are given for going through the deep jungle of emotion and coming out the other side. Knowing this really does help when the next wave arrives. ❤ ❤
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So true Eliza. The knowing helps so much as we navigate the highs and lows of life. 💕
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Yes…it is one of my mirrors. Embrace, feel, heal. Great post, Val. 💕
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I exalt your last post. You live this beautifully Carrie. 💛
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❤
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Pain is hard teacher, Val, and there are experiences that I would rather not have lived, but there is learning in each of them, especially about compassion. ❤
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Thanks Diana. We we not be who we are or where we are without those experiences. Compassion is such a gift. 💕
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|Always the most difficult times, and there have been many, have been my greatest teachers and my most creative. This most recent illness has been the most extraordinary spiritual experience; I am not through it yet but the grace and the power and presence of God in my life, is guiding me along the still waters to a place of silence and peace where I can hear His voice and listen to His words.
Twameva Mata, Chapita Twameva.
Twameva Bandhu, Cha Sakha Twameva.
Twameva Vidya, Dravinum Twameva.
Twameva Sarvam Mama Deva Deva.
Om Shanti, Shanti, Shanti.
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Finding Presence and the Divine in our pain such a true gift. Thank you for sharing here Helen. May you find ease and wellbeing on your journey. 💛🙏💛
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As Rumi says, “The wound is the place where the light enters.” So true 💕 Great post Val.
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Love that quote Karen. Thank you 💕
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I have found this to be true, though any kind of pain becomes old very quickly. Chronic pain has given me more compassion and connection to others for which I’m thankful. But there are times….
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Thank you Betty for your honest response 💕
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…There are times when you just want to give up! But you remember…..
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Perception is everything! I just started a blog here; please check it out and let me know what you think! 🙂
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We learn a lot from it. We become strong because of it.
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Yes. And we keep learning through reflection. Thank you Arlene.💛
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Beautiful wisdom here Val and yes we then have more empathy for others. Compassion grows through our own experience and journey.
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Thank you Kath. I love these words – compassion grows through our experience and journey. 💕
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Hey Val,
This is the 2nd best post I read from your blog today. Keep motivating us.
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Glad you feel motivated to embrace life fully Kedy 💛
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It is true that we need sometimes to transcend to low depths to achieve pure liberation..
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Thank you 💛 Low depths are part of life. When we embrace them as such, we don’t suffer as much.
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Embrace, surrender? Same thing I guess 🙏
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For me, this is more true for emotional pain than physical pain, although I supposed we can learn from both.
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This quote comes from the perspective of emotional and mental pain rather than simply physical. (Although the physical usually comes with a big does of the other!) thanks Ann ❣️
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I figured it meant emotional and mental…I just read the post right before I was headed off to the dentist’s office, so I had a different perspective. LOL!
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I hope your dental work is over and done with Ann, and you are a happy chewer again!
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How you deal with physical pain is an emotional and mental journey in its own as well.
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This is soooo good Val ❤
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Thank you dear Julie 💛
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Beauty from ashes, a rising Phoenix, scars displaying survival. …brokenness is opportunity for growth.
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Lovely words!
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Thank you taken time to enjoy them 💛
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You’re most welcome!
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Hey great blog, Val! I really enjoyed it. I think you would appreciate my blog as well. http://www.TremendousTeacher.com I am taking my readers on a journey through my chaotic life as a teacher. You’ll probably relate and laugh at the stories of my wild world 🙂 Thanks for any feedback! Keep up the good work!
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Thanks for the energy boost 😎
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No problem! Keep up the good fight 🙂
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Pingback: Pain as Your Teacher – One Nigerian Woman
Reblogged this on One Nigerian Woman.
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I just started writing yesterday.
I write because I need an outlet for the pain in my heart.
I only just put down the thoughts running through my head adn then I found your post.
May I dare to hope that I will learn something from the pain that I feel.
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There is often a lesson when we acknowledge the pain, and open up to a new insight to our life and circumstances. The lesson is usually to take care of your self, heart and soul. Keep listening and keep writing to inspire other women to do the same 💕
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This really resonates with me after my challenging experiences of battling an eating disorder. I am grateful for this post.
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I am so glad that it resonates with you. May you continue to feel the strength within you 💕
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Courageous to share! 🌸🌸
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Thank you 💝
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We grow the most when adversity hits us in the face with 12 tones of brick. If life were easy we will just not grow. It is alot like working out. The more resistance you put (weight) the stronger the muscle gets. After giving you a ton of pain.
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Working out is a good analogy Aranad. Keep building those muscles and your inner resilience 💛
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