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Embrace the present
Life’s challenges are lessons
Don’t wait for hindsight

These words came to me yesterday after two challenging days. Early on Wednesday morning, my husband had severe stomach ache that took us to the emergency room. He was in so much pain, and we knew it was likely to be a gallbladder attack. This was confirmed, and surgery was recommended to remove it. Thankfully the pain eased and he was kept comfortable. Surgery took place on Thursday and was a success. He came home yesterday morning and is doing well.

That’s the background. Here’s the lesson.

No matter what is happening be aware of how you are responding to the situation. Events can throw us off and bring up many feelings and ways to cope. I was surprised at how much anger came up at first – Missing my sleep, not being able to help with the pain, cancelling my plans, taking care of the dogs, finding parking ….. Then I was with him in the ER and everything changed. I had got him there. The anger was a way for me to be strong and push forward. I felt relief.

People sent me encouraging messages and support. Thank you! I appreciated them all, yet I also realized I was still in the “be strong” frame of mind. Holding myself together and not allowing myself to feel fully. The armor and stiff upper lip were well in place. As I recognized it’s power, I also saw that there is a pattern here, not just in times of crisis, when someone must take charge, but a lesson for me in life.

When things don’t go the way I want, the initial response is anger. Amygdala hijack, adrenalin rush and ego-mind focuses on what needs to be done. Feelings are dismissed. The priority is taking action. Val the Valkyrie emerges!

woman in body armor

And I now see clearly that sometimes there is fallout on the people around me who feel unheard, dismissed and rejected. Warrior mode may work, but listening to our heart bring us back into balance.

Priorities must shift back to the heart so we can find our true selves again. He is my love and my priority. I hope I won’t need a crisis and hindsight to remind me again.

33 comments on “Haiku – life’s challenges

  1. Wow! Remind me to call you in an emergency dear lady 😂 🤣 But yes, we do have coping strategies in place in those circumstance, the hardest part is in recognizing them. Take a bow, change is at hand 😀 And glad you are both ok 😀 ❤️ 🙏🏽 🦋

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Good to hear that everything’s OK now, Val. We do seem to be taken over by someone totally different in times of crisis, don’t we? 🙂

    Liked by 2 people

    • Thank you Tom! Yes, we do. I read an article about how Evil Twin Skippy appears when we get stressed. Sounds like inspiration for a new post 😎

      Liked by 1 person

  3. Glad it worked out. I hear those are quite painful. We are lucky to live in an age where it can be remedied.

    Liked by 3 people

  4. good to hear all is well now

    Liked by 1 person

  5. Val, I appreciate this post so much. First to know that your husband is well and secondly to appreciate and reflect upon the experience for you…and me. I have been in a similarly stressful place these last few days…with a beloved pet. It is challenging to watch ourselves while we are simultaneously IN the situation. And yet, sometimes our compassionate warrior is needed and is essential in the moment. My challenge has been to not turn the upset and anger on myself as has been my lifelong habit. Rather I am learning to realize my anger is an indicator of what is important and respond from there, rather than from the fear that has been the foundation of my anger in the past. It continues to make all the difference. Thank you for this timely and important reflection, dear Val. 🙏🏻💜☮️

    Liked by 3 people

    • Thank you Carrie for your reflections and kind words. I’m so sorry to hear about your dear pet. They are so much a part of our lives and live in our hearts. It’s heartbreaking when they are sick or are about to leave us. Sending love, healing light and a hug. 💖🙏🏼🕊

      Liked by 1 person

  6. Anger is the ego shouting, “NO!” Maybe.

    Liked by 1 person

  7. pyonchek

    Val, Went through similar situation last year. Realized later that I didn’t take off the armor and kept pushing until I had a physical injury that forced me to release the stress from the harrowing experience. Glad you woke up more quickly. 💕

    Liked by 2 people

  8. I love Val the Valkyrie!! 🤩And you share beautiful wisdom here. I too have responded this way many times in life, missing the call of my heart to feel and heal old wounds. So important to take the time to acknowledge our deepest feelings. Glad all is well again. 🧡💕

    Liked by 3 people

  9. Love your honest insight, Val. You’re a warrior-goddess! 🙂
    Glad all is well with your hubby, and peace reigns once again. ❤

    Liked by 1 person

    • Thank you Eliza 💖 To be honest, finding a sense of balance came first. I was so disconnected from my body when I taught on Sunday. There is an interim time for rebalancing in order for peace to prevail … in mind body and spirit. Im familiar with warrior … and not so much the goddess. Perhaps that is what I will embrace at Kripalu in August.

      Liked by 1 person

  10. Students of Life feel just right. Thank you Michele 💐🙏💐

    Like

  11. Good to hear your husband had a successful surgery and well on the road to recovery. Ensure he takes a light diet for a couple of weeks and plenty of water to get all those toxic drugs out of his system.

    Now’s the time to let all that pent-up anxiety and tension go and settle back into balance. 🙂

    Liked by 2 people

    • Thank you dear Vicki. He is doing remarkably well. He is made from ox and mule genes and can get through recovery well. 😉 balance and lightness is next 🙏🏼

      Liked by 1 person

  12. Glad the surgery went well. Life can be so challenging . . . even after we’ve found our middle ground a time or two. Enjoy the day. Keep breathing. Best wishes to your husband!

    Liked by 2 people

    • Thanks Nancy ❣️ He is remarkable in recovery. When he knows the job that needs to be done, he gets on with it. Very practical and reassuring. Life is good 💐🙏🏼💐

      Like

  13. Sending healing thoughts your husbands way Val… and hope he recovers swiftly..

    Always wise to listen to our hearts……. And Life often throws us a curved ball to show us what really our priorities are in life..
    Sending love and well wishes to you both Val.. ❤

    Liked by 1 person

  14. You did well to realize and embrace. Anger is a motivator, ’tis true, but it can also be a disturbing nemesis. I know it well. Yet in TCM, fire is the heart’s ruler, so we always possess the opportunity to transform anger into love. Interesting journey, this life! 😈😇💓

    Liked by 2 people

    • Thank you Bela 🙏🏼 I am so aware of anger and the fail out from it. A disturbing nemesis rings true. Its time to embrace the fire element now we are heading into summer. Fire, anger when the heat rises, and also embracing the love and connection to others from the heart 🌹🙏🏼🌹

      Liked by 1 person

  15. Val, I am so glad your husband is recovering well and that you did what you needed to be strong for him. You are amazing – such a strong desire to learn and be a source of light in the world, and such powerful insights. Thank you for sharing your struggles and truths.

    Liked by 2 people

    • Thank you so much Vicki for your kind words. 💖 They are affirming. My path has become clear… to be aware…to learn … to grow … and share. 💐🙏🏼💐

      Like

  16. Val, I am sorry this happened with your husband and hope he is continuing to heal nicely. I had my gallbladder removed in 2010 and know a little bit about how that can play out. It sounds like you learned so much during these challenging days. There is something to learn all the time, I think. *smile*

    Liked by 1 person

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