Find Your Middle Ground
Life is a series of highs and lows. Be grateful in the highs. Be graceful in the lows. Find contentment in your Middle Ground
* Reflections – People are our Mirrors
No pun intended here 😉 just some morning musings…
There is an old saying, “It takes one to know one.”
We see in others what we like and don’t like in ourselves.
If people are our mirrors, then everyone is a reflection of myself.
Its important for me to accept others for who they are.
Otherwise I am rejecting aspects of myself.
When I admire an aspect of someone I am recognizing that this is a part of myself.
When I am judging of others I am not accepting that I am judging of myself.
When I get annoyed because they are needy, I am rejecting my own needs and nurturing myself.
When I get frustrated when people go too slowly, then I am not accepting when I need to go slowly.
And of course, the best of all …. When I get upset when I feel others are controlling, I am rejecting the controlling part of me.
Ouch!
Our own inner critic is the voice of this self rejection.
Listen to it and love it for pointing out what to embrace rather than reject.
Remember there is no good or bad… And beneath it all is our deep longing for love and acceptance.
Namaste
A relative of mine is deeply intolerant of another relative’s intolerance. The joke deepens when you consider that what the first relative abhors most is hypocrisy.
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Love this Hariod!
(GRIN)
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I think Val, that’s why community and our connection to it is so important. I come to know myself more in community than in solitude, Although it’s probably a balancing of the two. But community is often not an easy place to be simply because of it’s challenge in revealing ourselves to ourselves through others.
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I agree Don. Community is a great place of learning. We reveal ourselves and have the opportunity to interact with people we may not otherwise do in life. I intentionally connect to people with different views and outlooks. It allows me to look at my own reactions and keep growing as a person. Of course, there are also the “keepers’ who share the same curiosity and exploration of our inner worlds!
I’m so grateful to having you with me on this journey Don.
Val x
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Thank you Val. Very kind of you.
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🙂
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Thank you Nomzi!
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You are so welcome Val 🙂
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Great post! So true Val.
Each encounter is but a reflection of what’s within. It is from that perspective that we gain insight. 🙂
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Thank you Storm. Each encounter is a reflection and a lesson.
Val x
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Thanks for the work that you do Val. 🙂
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Some would say that we should never judge the actions of others. I don’t agree. Judgments allow us to discern our values and moral core, and help us decide how we wish to proceed through life:
* Seeing others embrace “excess materialism” (a judgment) encouraged me to embrace simplicity.
* Seeing factory farms engage in animal abuse (a judgment) encouraged me to eschew meat.
* Seeing hoarders hoarding (a judgment) encouraged me to declutter my own life.
Judgments keep us from making the “mistakes they are making.”
Sometimes we get annoyed at others because they are exhibiting a trait we have not fully integrated and accepted as part of ourselves.
Sometimes. But not always.
Other times our annoyance is for other reasons entirely:
* I get annoyed (to use a gentle word) with animal abuse, child abuse, and elderly abuse because those actions are morally wrong, not because I share the abuse trait with abusers.
* I get annoyed at bullies and line cutters and liars and cheats and polluters and litterers because I am acting as “unpaid advocate” for the “little guy” whose rights they are trampling.
* I get annoyed when people are late, time and time again, not because I share that trait, but because they are being selfish. In essence, they are saying that their time is more important than mine.
A flicker of annoyance, standing alone, does not always mean that the object of our annoyance is acting as a mirror for something we need to work on.
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This landed in my In Box today and I thought it might appeal to me:
http://www.marriedwithluggage.com/stop-judging-others/?utm_source=feedburner&utm_medium=email&utm_campaign=Feed%3A+marriedwithluggage+%28Married+With+Luggage+blog%29
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I’ll listen in to the show later. Love this quote:
“The ability to observe without evaluating is the highest form of intelligence.” ~ Jiddu Krishnamurti
Val x
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Nancy, Thank you for opening up such a rich perspective.
I appreciate you sharing your personal awareness of your inner world of discernment, judgment and core values – and how this clarity supports your thinking and interactions with others.
Being able to look inwards and being an observer of our thoughts, feelings and sensations when we are annoyed is a powerful practice.
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Yes! Stepping into the role of observer is a powerful practice.
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How true, people are our mirrors… in a school, pupils looks like their teachers… great post, as ever ♥
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Thank you Frederic. Pupils look like their teachers and share their values and outlook. I like this perspective….. at least from my own teacher perspective 😉
💛
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Love this post Val! I like to ask myself, when judging others, good or bad, what inside me is prompting this. ❤
Diana xo
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What’s inside me? Is a wonderful question Diana!
Thank you for visiting in and adding to the conversation. I appreciate it 💛
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This, for me, conjures Humphrey Bogart; “Here’s looking at you kid,” 🙂
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Love being called kid.
Thank you Thank you Uncle Eric 🙂
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So true Val. Every once in a while, when I remember this, there is a deep silence…understanding!! ❤
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Thanks Lorrie ❤
These ahah! moment can come gently from within 🙂
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Many times I haven’t liked what is reflecting back to me in the mirror! And still, I am so glad for these beautiful teachers who show me my soul and encourage me to be who I am meant to be. Your post reminds us we can accept this!
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I love this Karen. Thank you.💛
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