At certain times in our lives, we may feel we are stuck or disappointed in where we find ourselves. There is a sense that something has to change, but we may not be sure about what it is. All we know is that where we are, isn’t where we want to be…
Rather than getting more and more frustrated and annoyed at the external environment and blaming other people, try bringing your attention to what is going on inside of you. This is where the answer lies.
This is a time for inner reflection, increased self awareness and seeing things from new perspectives. In taking time to pause you will ignite an inner spark for lasting change.
Here are the four areas that I talk about with my clients. (Adapted from the work of master coach Marshall Goldsmith).
1. Creating:
What do you want to create? How do you want to be different? What is your vision for yourself?
2. Preserving:
What are you grateful for? What do you want to preserve?
3. Eliminating:
What negative elements need to be eliminated? What do you need to stop doing?
4. Accepting:
What are you ready to accept and make peace with? What do you need to let go of from the past? Who do you need to forgive?
This is a holistic and mindful approach to maintain balance as you bring about the change you long for. The questions help you consider both the positive and negative elements that are a part of life. The answers can only be found within yourself. Sometimes it is difficult to find the answers by yourself, and that is where I can support you as a coach and teacher.
In this place of inquiry and reflection, you are on the way to finding your middle ground and life in balance.
Great advice, Val. Number 3 is a big one for me.
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Thanks Jill. Not surprising – we all like to create and build on the good stuff rather than addressing what might be holding us back 😉
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Such great questions for one to ask themselves, I will have to chew on these for a while… Thanks Val. xx
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Thank you Julie for stopping by and pondering 🙂
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It’s my pleasure! And I really am going to ponder those questions. 🙂
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☺️
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Indeed. Thank you Val. 🙂
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We’re aligned — not a surprise! 🙂
My blog today is called, What is the more I seek? And it is all about the inner exploration, the going home to my heart to explore the question.
thanks Val! You’ve cast light onto my path.
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I love it when we shine our torches/flashlights together Louise! xo
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Wonderful advice Val, for which many thanks. Sometimes, we just have the feeling that ‘something is wrong’, yet we remain unable to identify quite what it is, or indeed even if the feeling is justified in any way. Inevitably, we look outside of ourselves, or in this case, outside of the feeling itself. Very often, when and if we look, we find that all that exists is a feeling, and the only thought attributable to that feeling is that ‘something is wrong’, whereas in fact nothing identifiable is wrong. As they say in the North of England: “There’s nowt so queer as folk”. H ❤
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My Great Aunt Edie (from Edinburgh) used to say that!
https://nrhatch.wordpress.com/2011/10/07/theres-naught-so-queer-as-folk/
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Aha! So it appears to be ‘naught’ in Scotland, and ‘nowt’ in Yorkshire Nancy – the folk are still queer though!
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Great article about ego Nancy! Of course the quote is spot on too 😉
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Love it Hariod! There’s nowt as complex as folks either 😉
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my new favorite
technique for today 🙂
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Thank you David!
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These are good questions for reflection to encourage growth and inner peace.
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Thank you Suzi 💛
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When we let go of attachments and expectations, we are free to evolve, change and grow, from tiny ripples of peace and acceptance, to tidal waves of love and compassion.
How refreshing the whinny of a pack horse fully unloaded! ~ Classic Haiku
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What an insightful approach to letting go Nancy. The unload and the destination are equally important. 🙂
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Great steps to practice Val. Acceptance is my hero. Once I get that I seem to move forward. 🙂
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All the steps need to come together bring transformation. Acceptance can be the hardest, but most powerful. Thanks Karen!
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Great food for further thought, Val! Useful even when we don’t feel “stuck” as there’s always some work to be done – at least for me – in these four areas 🙂
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Nothing stays the same … and so coming back to questions and writings can keep our mind and heart open to new possibilities. Thank you Tiny for your kind words and support!
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Oh, I forgot to say that I like the concept of “sparking” change!
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I love those questions Val and I agree, sometimes a coach or a friend or partner can help us figure it out. It’s kind of like how easy I can be objective or see what’s going on when I’m not personally or emotionally involved, but when I’m personally involved, sometimes I have blinders on. ❤
Diana xo
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Yes indeed Diana 🙂
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