“We do not see things as they are. We see things as we are.”— Rabbi Shemuel ben Nachmani, as quoted in the Talmudic tractate Berakhot (55b.)
Anaïs Nin also reflected the same idea. Seeing is not believing—believing is seeing. Our perception is shaped by our previous experiences.
What we say, and how we approach something is always through filters of our making.
I started to ponder today about how other’s perceptions of themselves and their relationship to us, informs their message for us.
As spiritual seekers, we look to the words of others to show us the truth.
As patients we look to the words of the doctors to show us the truth.
As someone facing challenging times we seek out friends for support and help, and hope that they too will reveal the truth.
In doing so it is easy to become attached to the words of others. We begin to count on them. We grasp at the hope that things will turn out the way we want.
Yet in our heart of hearts we know that the truth doesn’t lie there.
We have become attached to the outcome that we hope for, rather than seeing clearly all of reality.
In yoga this is called avidya – not seeing things as they are. We become attached to how we want things to be. We mistake the impermanent for the eternal.
Today I woke up and saw the messages as a reflection of others’ perceptions and experiences. In seeing this I was able to detach and face a bigger reality.
There must be a letting go of what we are attached to, in order to truly find our middle ground and inner peace.
The ultimate attachment we have is to life as we know it and life itself. Accepting impermanence over life is not an easy thing. We may understand it intellectually, but facing it and living it can be so darn hard.
I find comfort in this version of the Buddha’s Five Remembrances, offered by Thich Nhat Hanh in The Plum Village Chanting Book.
- I am of the nature to grow old. There is no way to escape growing old.
- I am of the nature to have ill health. There is no way to escape ill health.
- I am of the nature to die. There is no way to escape death.
- All that is dear to me and everyone I love are of the nature to change. There is no way to escape being separated from them.
- My actions are my only true belongings. I cannot escape the consequences of my actions. My actions are the ground upon which I stand.

May you all feel the warm embrace of compassion and understanding for this fear filled path called life. For those of you facing this ultimate reality, may you find a way to let go and be at peace.
Namaste
“There must be a letting go of what we are attached to, in order to truly find our middle ground and inner peace.” So true!
Thank you for this post, Val.
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Thank you Jill for being here. It means a lot 💛
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It’s a powerful message you share today, Val, thank you so much.
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It was also a difficult message to see an unravel. Thank you Jet 💛
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You’ve given us a lot to think about today.
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Thanks Dan. It was a tough day. 🙏
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Hi Val, this is a healthy dose of reality in a world that likes to wear rose-tinted glasses.
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I can relate to this thinking Jean. Thank you for bringing practical wisdom always. 💛
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A very beautiful article Val, on many different levels. Thank you for your ever kind and gentle insight. Nothing is as it seems. There are many times when I read words on a page that are not really there…
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Thanks so much for your presence here 💛
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Thanks for today’s post Val. They are powerful and wise words.
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Thank you Lorraine 💛
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A healing mantra, Val:
H _/\_
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A powerful and healing mantra. Thank you Hariod.
You guided me to my favorite by Snatam Kaur .. Not knowing how much it meant until now. Before, it was for others.
💕
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Thank you for all of this. I am keeping it in my heart.
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Thank you so much Marlene 💕
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Sending you lots of love and hugs Val. Speaking from our hearts is what connects us to each other. A beautiful post to remind us to look past what overwhelms us this day and to know we are never alone on this journey. 💛🌺
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Thank you Karen for always speaking from your heart and warming mine. We are not alone 💕
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Thank you so much for sharing this today Val ❤
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Thank you for being here to read it Julie 💛
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May you find peace and acceptance in the midst of the challenges you face.
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Thanks Nancy! Today was a better day. May there be more and more ahead 💛
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Letting go is hard. I relearn it every single day.
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Relearning indeed Kate! Thank you for being here 💛
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This post has so much powerful wisdom, at so many levels. Believing is seeing. Accepting that we – and others – cannot control much at all, even less steer life itself to the outcomes we want, and is not easy. And yet, letting go is the path to inner peace. And with that comes healing. Much love ❤
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Thank you so much Helen for your kind words and understanding of life!
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There’s a lot to think about here, and I really appreciate that. It sounds so simple just to let go of looking for the truth from others, but it can be hard to do that. But then, most things worth doing are hard. And that’s why I appreciate your blog..there’s a lot of wisdom presented here.
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Thank you Ann. There is complexity and simplicity in understanding life. Some days are easier than others to get a hold of!
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“My actions are my only true belongings.” I love this, Val. Thank you for sharing.
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So glad you are taking something away from this Carol. Thank you for being here 💛
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I agree Val, it is more easy to accept intellectual than to integrate it in the daily life, but absolutely worth doing it 😀
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Thank you Irene for your thoughtful comment 💕
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