Young Val and twin bro
I came across this old photograph (of me and my twin brother) and not longer after, found an exercise on self acceptance.

Turns out they both went well together. To find out why, please read the exercise below…. and take some time in doing it for yourself.

Step One
Imagine someone you love and admire sitting opposite you. He or she is smiling at you. How do you feel about them? If this person was to make a mistake, could you and would you forgive them?

Step Two
Using your imagination, put yourself in the chair opposite you. Imagine you are sitting there smiling back at yourself. How do you feel about her or him? Do you feel the same way about her or him as you did towards the first person, the one you love and admire, or is the feeling different? If this person made a mistake could you, or would you forgive her? Are you more forgiving of the other person?

This exercise often highlights a discrepancy between how we love and accept others, compared to ourselves.

Step Three
Find a photograph of yourself as a child, and place it where you see it everyday. Let this remind you to be loving and accepting of yourself.
This child is precious, as are you.


p.s. When I did this exercise myself, even after all the inner work I have done, there was a difference in how I perceived myself making a mistake compared to my response towards someone I love. With the person I loved, there was an surge of love and empathy and urge to understand. With myself, there was an initial  slight withdrawal and contraction in the body and some judgment before I was able to feel empathy and compassion.

Notice what you notice without any more self judgment.

Its so helpful to keep coming back to where we are on our journey…. and to remind us of our infinite capacity to grow our love. ❤️


About Val Boyko

Val Boyko is originally from Scotland and came to the United States over 25 years ago. At "Find Your Middle Ground" Val brings together her experience as a life coach, yoga teacher and mentor, to inspire awakening to the light and inspiration within us all. This blog is a place of exploration and discovery as we all explore finding harmony and peace, in the highs and lows of life 💛

26 comments on “* Its Never too Late for Self Acceptance

  1. Funnily enough Val, I kept imagining seeing an old photograph of myself as a twelve year-old just yesterday; perhaps I will dig it out. H ❤

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Love the idea of a picture of us as a child to help provide the reminder that we are just as precious now as we were then… and just as worthy of love and forgiveness. I have to practice this one! Thank you!

    Liked by 2 people

    • Thank you Kate. Its is worthwhile practice as it brings clarity about our real feelings. Not for the faint of heart 😉


  3. Thanks for sharing this. It sounds like a great exercise.

    Liked by 1 person

  4. It is interesting that you brought this up. Over recent months, spending time going through family photos of my growing up years, I did find that I had this instinct of compassion towards the young child (me) and there was a very strong urge to protect her, from the world that she would soon face. I am much less empathetic to the adult me.

    Liked by 1 person

  5. I tried this while reading it. There was quite a contrast in how I felt about the other person versus myself. This is definitely something I need to work on. Oddly enough, this is something that’s been on my mind for the last couple of days, so this is perfect timing.

    Liked by 1 person

  6. What a great exercise to try, and what an adorable photo of you! x

    Liked by 1 person

  7. This is a great exercise, Val. Lately, I’ve been thinking when I get upset with someone, “What is it about myself that I am upset with?” It works similarly because it helps me see where I am not loving myself and flipping it onto someone else. A roundabout way for working on inner and outer compassion.

    You two were absolutely ADORABLE! How did your mother get anything done – I’d be wanting to mush you up all the time! 😉

    Liked by 2 people

  8. A lovely photo, Val! This was beautiful, and revealing, exercise. I too, felt different although I thought I would not 🙂 More work to be done on this!

    Liked by 1 person

  9. Great exercise, Val.
    I love that photo of the two of you as “wee bairns.”

    Liked by 1 person

  10. I love the idea of finding a picture of myself as a child Val. Great post – thank you! ❤
    Diana xo

    Liked by 1 person

  11. Love the photo. As to Step 1: reminds me of –

    Marina Abramovic

    Liked by 1 person

  12. Val, I’m so glad I stumbled on this post a little late. It fits beautifully with a client I’m helping with poor body esteem. And another who struggles with criticism of everyone she knows, when asked if she is critical of herself, said “Of course!” So we must start with the self, and towards that self be compassionate, loving, tolerant, forgiving, understanding and kind.

    Liked by 1 person

    • So glad you found this Sunny and were able to share the good ness. I sometimes forget how I also assumed being critical of myself was the only way. Thank you for sharing your kindness. ❤


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