My Mum died suddenly and peacefully on October 18 2024. The candle I had lit, went out at 2.26am just as she passed. She was surrounded by my brother and family and I was with her in spirit, sending her love and light 🤍✨🕊️.
I chose to re-post this today to remind myself and others who are facing pivotal life moments, that there is always love, and courage comes from the heart.
A fully lived life is filled with pivotal moments.
We humans like to think of the uplifting ones like falling in love, births, getting that job, promotion and special celebrations. It makes us feel good.
But living life fully is about living the whole of life. Embracing the highs and lows and finding our middle ground despite the challenges.
Pivotal moments are when we see and feel things in a completely new way. But there is also the deeper challenging moments of unexpected changes, such as accidents, disruptions and unexpected endings, and losses.
Events that prompt you to do some soul searching, see something in a completely different way or to do something you would not ordinarily do, are pivotal.
It’s the ah ha moment that makes you see something completely different and anew.
It isn’t about the external circumstances, it’s about how we experience them in a different way.
It is about witnessing our internal responses to what is happening and allowing a different perspective to emerge.
Simply put, a moment presents itself, and we see it in a new way.
And yes, it can be unsettling and scary too.
It may take us some time to see this clearly, especially when we are caught up in distressing emotions, but the time will come when we can look back and say, yes! This where my life changed and I wouldn’t be where I am, or who I have become, if I hadn’t experienced this.
Don’t wish your life away seeking comfort, holding on to the past or grasping for pleasure. Be open to it all. Let the pivot begin.
Sending courage from my heart to yours.
Namaste



Great, great post Valerie. Thank you and bless you for your courage and strength.
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Thank you so much 💐🙏💖
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Oh, Val, I’m sorry to read of the loss of such an important person in your life. May the love and support of friends and family help and heal you at this ‘pivotal’ time. 💜🙏🏼
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Thank you so much Eliza 💐🙏💖
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What a lovely tribute…to your Mum, to Life and to what is. You walk so gracefully into this and in so doing become a beacon for us as we consider our individual responses to losses.
May your journey to Scotland be uneventful, and blessed with love as you are carried home.
Bless you, dear Val. And thank you. 🙏🏻 💜
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Thank you so much Carrie fir your kind and inspiring words🙏
Ian looking forward to being in Scotland and feeling the welcome from the land itself. It gives me strength and always inspires. 💞
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🙏🏻💜
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Oh Val, my deepest sympathy – my thoughts are with you and your family. Your words are the perfect way to pay tribute to you Mum, and I wish you strength at this difficult time. ❣️
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Thank you so much Cathy. Are loved her garden and herbaceous border for flower arranging. I got my love of flowers from her 💐
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Carrie found the perfect words Val. I could not say it anywhere near that well. I am so grateful to have you as one of the “people with great wisdom”… Who helps me continue my efforts to search for and stay near “The Middle Ground”.
May God surround you and your family with Strength, Love, Safety, and Peace during this difficult time.
I lost my Mum December 30, 2020. I have a candle lit for her right now. It rarely goes out.
Blessings and Peace,
Paul
🙏❤️🙏
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Thank you so much Paul. Lighting a candle, taking time to remember, and also just being kind makes a difference for everyone. 🥰
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A beautiful post Val which honours your mum and the pivotal moments of change. What a blessing she had such a full life. Sending love to you and your family. 💞🩷💞
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Thank you so much Karen. 💞She really had a good innings, as she would say, and left this world just the way she would want to. No lingering. No fuss. No mess.
She was pragmatic and practical to the end. 💐
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A beautiful tribute to your mother, Val. Sending deepest condolences to you and your family. 🩷
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Thank you so much Jennifer💐🙏💖
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My heart is with you Val, these moments truly do ask us to look deeper and touch what we are. And of them all, a loss touches us so profoundly. Much sympathy kind lady, the strength in a hug, much love and light, to you and all that are touched by this moment. May that love that only a mum can be, ever be a part of you on your hearts path. And thank you for sharing that moment in your lovely words here with us all ❤️🙏
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Thank you Mark 💐. I am grateful that we were good friends in her later years, after a challenging earlier relationship. I think we both grew up together❣️
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Indeed kind lady, that very path building much love for you both ❤️🙏
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I’m so sorry about your loss, Val. I wish you peace and love in the days, weeks and months ahead as you enter into your grief. 💕
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Thank you so much Carol 💐🙏💖
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I am sorry for your loss. My mom is gone a long time and I still miss her and remember her vividly. She also lived a full life of love.
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Thank you Kate💐 your Mom sounds very special.
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Just beautiful- vulnerable and authentic and poignant.
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Thank you Sharon. 💐 May we all open our hearts and find the courage to embrace the pivotal moments in our lives… with good friends with us along the way ❣️
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Oh, Val. Sorry for your loss. As necessary and expected as death is, we are not always ready for it when it appears. Peace.
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Thank you dear Nancy 💐🙏🏻💖
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A beautiful and compelling post, Val. It’s never easy to lose a mother no matter the relationship. I loved your comment “A fully lived life is filled with pivotal moments.” I’ve been so fortunate to see life in a different way than most which has helped make those pivotal moments so much easier to traverse. I sense you have a feeling of peace which is always the best way I lost my mother in 2001. I was blindsided by the grief I never expected. Death is not the end so I had a lot to process in that pivotal moment. Life does have so many of them. I am sorry for your loss as well. It’s just never easy.
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Thank you so much Marlene 💐🙏🏻💖
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So sorry for your loss ❤️
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Thank you so much 💐🙏🏻💖
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I’m so sorry to hear about your loss of your mom, Val. The photos are beautiful and your reflections of the pivotal moments of life is full of grace and wisdom. Our parents contribute in profound ways to who we become and who we are today. You are a tribute to who she was. Good job, mom.
I often think about how all the stepping stones (pivotal moments) matter – the smooth and steady ones, those that wobbly or make us fall, the sharp ones, the giant ones where we can stretch out with others. They all led to this moment and we wouldn’t be who we are without them. That journey is worth our contemplation.
Sending you light and love and peace with your loss. Hugs.
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Thank you so much Diana 💐🙏🏻💖
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I’m so very sorry, Val! Losing a mom is so hard. Sending hugs…..
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Thanks so much Ann 💐🙏🏻💖
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So sorry to read about your mom. A lovely tribute and reflection. Thank you. 🙏🏻
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Thank you Michele 💐🙏🏻💖
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You’re very welcome, Val. 💖
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So sorry for your loss. You will always have wonderful memories, which will always be with you.
I lost my mum 5 years ago and it is difficult . I still feel she listens to me and looks out for me.
Our love for our mums will never seize.
Big hugs to you , thinking of you.
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Thank you so much Ute 💐🙏🏻💖
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Val, I am so sorry to hear of your loss. Sending you love and strength during this time of goodbye.
I very much appreciate this post. ☮️
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Thank you so much 💐🙏🏻💖
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She is lovely, as are you. I am sorry for your loss. Love to you Val.
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Thank you Cindy 💐🙏🏻💖
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Sending you love, Val. Such a beautiful post.
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My heart is sending a giant hug to you through space. Your beautiful post is an honor to connect to…such truth. I am sorry for your loss, but more importantly, I am happy for the time you had together. And as you stated, life will be forever changed. ❤
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Thanks so much Lorrie 💐These are not ordinary times, and call for resilience and courage to face the injustices and inhumanity around the world and in our own back yard. 💞
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Amen, Val…Amen! Working on staying in the light and illuminating all of the darkness!! ❤
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Beautiful post of unmeasurable love.
May you continue to be held in loving kindness during this time and in years ahead ❤️
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Thank you so much 💐
I have to say that waking up to a Trump victory and attending my mothers funeral wasnt easy. The love is always there, but in challenging times we must dig deep for courage and perseverance towards a peaceful and unified world.
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My condolences. A warm hug.
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Thank you Rupali🙏
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My condolences.
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