Today started as a welcome day with connection to dear friends at Chanticleer and then doing some trimming and nurturing in the garden.
It’s also a day when things fell apart. My horoscope foretold that was a transformational time in my birth horoscope. I was waiting for something. Up until two hours ago, I felt at ease and curious about what was unfolding.
Then suddenly everything changed. I was thinking about how I can flow through life’s ups and downs. It’s all about the centering …. right…?
As I was preparing for dinner I looked out the window, and saw something that sucked the breath out of me and shattered illusions that all is okay.
I saw a small squirrel that has been attacked. It may have been a cat, a fox or a fellow squirrel, but its head was covered in blood and it was blinded. There was no fur around its head and at the back of its neck there was a puncture wound. It was quivering on the north side of a tree and shaking its tail. Still alive and protecting itself. I stepped out and heard it’s cries.
Dear god, what can I do? Being present to suffering is hard. For those who are innocent and vulnerable it feels unbearable.
I went to get sunflower seeds to offer it food. Not sure if it’s enough, yet it’s all I can do. All I can do for now.
There is so much in nature and the world out there that we protect ourselves against. This dear squirrel reminds me of the intensity and fullness of my heart … and others when we let go of the protective barriers. I can’t save the world. I can’t save the wounded squirrel. But I can keep my heart open to bring love and compassion to all those who suffer.
I realise I am grieving for so much more. The squirrel who met its match and may not survive. The young woman who finds herself pregnant and doesn’t know what to do. The angry and fearful teen who doesn’t know what to with the anger inside and is looking for someone to blame. The mature man juggling with heart disease or cancer yet in denial of being vulnerable to disease and death.
The world is not an easy place to be fully alive in right now.
Yet, tomorrow is a new dawn of a new day. Everything comes and goes. May I still welcome the unfolding for myself, others who are struggling, Mother Nature and the world.