What Other People Think About You

This is one of my favorite “WAKE UP” poems from Portia Nelson concerning personal growth in Chapter Four of her autobiography. “There’s a Hole in My Sidewalk”.

Photo by Tim Douglas on Pexels.com

It is a waste of time and energy
to worry about
what others are thinking
about you.

because …

You can never know
exactly what another person
is thinking …AND,
the worst part is …
they are usually not thinking
about you at all.

They are too busy worrying about
what others
are thinking about them.

So, the truth is, all those terrible thoughts
you thought they might
be thinking about you,
are your own thoughts
about yourself.

Better spend your energy
worrying about that …or,
you just might
convince somebody to think
what you were afraid
they might be thinking
after all.*

Now that hit home didn’t it! Take a moment to consider how your worries about what others think about you, may be your own hidden thoughts about yourself….

We all go through aspects of this as we grow up and find our way in the world, but many of us get stuck along the way.

So much of social media targets our insecurities and outward judgment of others and ourselves. It thrives on gossip, comparison and competition and tries to sell us the answer.

Our thinking always appears through filters in our life experience, the messages we are hearing, and how we relate to others and the world around us.

And now consider … “My thoughts are not the truth”.

* Nelson, Portia. There’s a Hole in My Sidewalk: The Romance of Self-Discovery (pp. 107-108). Atria Books/Beyond Words. Kindle Edition.

38 responses to “What Other People Think About You”

  1. That’s a hard reality to accept, Val. Worth thinking about.

    Liked by 3 people

    1. Is it tho! Thanks Dan 💛

      Liked by 1 person

  2. Fortunately with age comes the realization that not everyone is going to like you and that’s okay. Thanks for sharing, Val!

    Liked by 2 people

    1. Thank you Jill 💛 it really is okay now!

      Liked by 1 person

  3. Great poem. Thanks for sharing it Val — and well said!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thank you Louise 🙏

      Like

  4. The poem made me smile, Val. It was true of my younger life for sure, but with age comes a bit of wisdom and a whole lot of not really caring about what others think. A great share. 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thank goodness with experience and growth over the years 🙏 Thank you Diana 💕

      Liked by 1 person

  5. This is a hard thing for me also

    My main focus is on my inner critic

    First we have to deal with what we think about ourselves

    With childhood abuse I find that I do not approve of myself

    Liked by 1 person

    1. The belief that there’s something wrong with us goes deep my friend. Thank you for sharing 💛

      Liked by 1 person

  6. True words Val. It’s not what they think that matters! 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thank you Tom! Keep expressing yourself in your own way 💛

      Liked by 1 person

  7. Incredibly helpful to me! Thank you SO much for sharing your wisdom ❤
    Paul K

    Liked by 1 person

    1. So glad this resonated Paul. Thank you for being here 💛

      Like

  8. So true, so true, so true!! An humbling reminder to simply check in to our self judgments.

    Liked by 1 person

  9. It’s so liberating when we release this fear! I Love getting older! 🙏🏻💚

    Liked by 1 person

    1. … and wiser! Thanks Karen 💛🙏💛

      Liked by 1 person

  10. so you’re saying I don’t have to worry about going outside wearing my compression socks pulled up to my knees, with a pair of shorts? 🙂

    Liked by 2 people

    1. It’s a look Jim 💛

      Liked by 1 person

  11. Yup. “What you think of me is none of my business.” ~ Wayne Dyer

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Love this quote Nancy❣️

      Liked by 1 person

  12. Recently I read this line, “what others think of you is none of your business.” I have been pondering it since. I tend to agree.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. I like that quote. I would add “what I think of me, is my business” thanks Sarah 💛

      Liked by 1 person

  13. That is so true! But it’s amazing how hard it can be for us to believe…..

    Liked by 1 person

    1. There has to be a mind shift that’s for sure. Thank you Ann 💛🙏💛

      Liked by 1 person

  14. Superb poem 😍😍

    Liked by 1 person

    1. So glad you appreciated it 🙏

      Like

      1. Talent like you needs to be praised ☺️☺️

        Liked by 1 person

  15. Love this. I just posted a photo and quote to Instagram not too long ago from Olin Miller, “We probably wouldn’t worry about what people think of us if we could know how seldom they do.”

    Liked by 2 people

    1. So ironic. So true. Thank you Bela 💛🙏💛

      Liked by 1 person

      1. Thank You, Val! 🙏🤗💞

        Liked by 1 person

  16. That’s a great poem, and something to think about too. thanks for sharing

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thank you for pausing here Willow 💛🙏

      Like

  17. It’s only difficult to think for yourself if you’re used to seeking approval. Then, the loneliness feels terrible, but only the person forgot integrity and honesty. The world does that.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thank you for adding your perspective 💛🙏💛

      Like

      1. You’re the person you were born to me. Be that person, honest and yourself, never mind others. Then, when we meet honest people, we see our own. Those people also don’t seek much attention, or any at all.

        Liked by 1 person

I’d love to hear from you …