Want more stress in your life? These are my lucky 13 tips guaranteed to make you stressed out and miserable in time for the Holidays.

holiday stress
Rosemarie Gearhart via Getty Images
  1. Strive for perfection in everything you do. Have faith that the smallest imperfection or oversight results in complete and utter failure.
  2. Always compare yourself to others. Look for where you don’t measure up and remind yourself daily.
  3. Surround yourself with negative people. Aggressive people who constantly criticize you, are a great way to focus on your failings and keep you miserable.
  4. Aim to spend at least 20% more than your income. A must for the Holiday season!
  5. Shop at peak times. Always wait to the day before the holiday to buy food. In supermarkets hold your ground in the “less than 10 items” line!stressful holiday shopping
  6. Remember your failures. Keep a failures log. Frequently go over your many occasions of incompetence.
  7. Breathe in “I feel grumpy”
    Breathe out “I feel tense”
    Breathe in “I am stupid”
    Breathe out “I fail at everything I do”
  8. Win at all costs, especially when you are in the wrong. Remember there is never justification for compromise. Bully and ridicule the other person in defeat until they admit fault.
  9. With your partner, make up a list of each other’s bad habits. Pin a weekly wall chart up to see who can add up the most irritating things about the other person. Go over the list on anniversaries and birthdays.
  10. Avoid vacations. If you do go away, do your duty and visit relatives. Always make sure the office can reach you quickly. Take your computer, cell and your admin’s home telephone number – in case you don’t hear from her or there’s no wifi.work stress
  11. Always over promise and under deliver. Say yes to everything. Commit yourself to impossible time lines. Of course, remember to do it all by yourself.
  12. Suffer in silence. Gain the maximum stress from a problem by trying to deal with it entirely on your own and always keep your worries to yourself.
  13. Dismiss other people’s offers of help. Show the world how independent you are. This is especially worthwhile when you are unwell. Always show up to work with a virus! The more unwell you feel, the more stoic you must be. Success is in complete physical and mental breakdown… and spreading the joy with colleagues.

To find happiness, review the above and do the opposite.

About Val Boyko

Val Boyko is originally from Scotland and came to the United States over 25 years ago. At "Find Your Middle Ground" Val brings together her experience as a life coach, yoga teacher and mentor, to inspire awakening to the light and inspiration within us all. This blog is a place of exploration and discovery as we all explore finding harmony and peace, in the highs and lows of life 💛

56 comments on “* Stressed For the Holidays

  1. Wonderful Val! Just a little “tongue in cheek” 🙂

    Liked by 3 people

  2. Well presented, Val. We need to be reminded of this stuff. ☺

    Liked by 2 people

  3. What a great list of what NOT to do. Thanks, Val! ❤

    Liked by 3 people

  4. Great list, Val. This time, I’ll do all the opposites.

    Liked by 3 people

  5. Unfortunately there are too many who really do this! I gave up being perfect years ago.

    Liked by 2 people

  6. HaHaHa…really funny, Val! Some of them sound very familiar 🙂 I needed a laugh like this this morning…Thanks! Hope this Monday finds you well and that you have a wonderful THanksgiving!! ❤

    Liked by 2 people

  7. The perfect follow-on from your previous post about holding back on offering advice – given that the recipient invariably does the opposite. Keep chuckling Val; it’s the only way to keep sane these days. H ❤

    Liked by 1 person

  8. I’m so glad I gave up on striving to achieve such stress. 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

  9. Love this! Especially:

    Breathe in “I feel grumpy”
    Breathe out “I feel tense”
    Breathe in “I am stupid”
    Breathe out “I fail at everything I do”

    Liked by 2 people

  10. Great advice for what not to do Val. Here’s to doing the opposite! 😊

    Liked by 1 person

  11. I had to give up stressing about anything. It’s bad for my health. 🙂 Perfection? What is that and who gets there? Not me. I like the tongue in cheek flavor of this. Have a good week ahead.

    Liked by 1 person

  12. Ha ha ha. So funny. It’s amazing how those traps can snag us. The one that gets me: “If you do go away, do your duty and visit relatives.” Ha ha. Thanks for the laugh, Val.

    Like

  13. LOL, this is brilliant! 🙂 I have to share

    Like

  14. Well done – I’m pretty sure I can avoid all of these.

    Like

  15. may be able
    to reverse all
    except that
    last one,
    but thanks
    anyway 🙂

    Like

  16. Haha, loved how serious you got with this 😉 Thank you 🙂

    Like

  17. Just what we all needed! Thanks Val. It reminds me of my favorite Christmas holiday ever… we told her mom that we were going to Phoenix to visit my mom. We told my mom that we would stay in LA to be with her mom. And then the two of us spent Christmas in London and New Years in Amsterdam. Best Holiday ever!

    Like

  18. Really enjoyed reading this and how you presented it. Be surprised how often we do these points.

    Liked by 1 person

  19. Great list! Worth passing out as a Christmas gift too ha. Thanks Val. 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

  20. Very funny, Val! And yet also just a bit familiar…..

    Liked by 1 person

  21. Pingback: Holiday Season | A Strong Life: People Enhancing People

  22. Hilarious, Val! Thanks for the levity as we head into the howlidays!

    Liked by 1 person

  23. Thank you for a wide smile, Val! I remember the time when I was a master of all these things 😎 The thing I’m still working on is to say no to everything I really don’t want to do…..mostly there but an occasional ‘yes’ still slips out…

    Liked by 1 person

  24. I am new to publishing my blogs (writing) and don’t know how this usually works. I will be the first one to admit to that but I hope you don’t mind I referenced you in one of my recent holiday blogs and put a link to get to this blog. If I did that incorrectly I’m sorry but I do love this blog. Thank you!

    Like

  25. I appreciate my imperfections so much, specially after this read Val 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

  26. Lol this was great. We have to laugh because we know everyone relates!

    Liked by 1 person

  27. So funny, Val! Thanks for the light-hearted post!

    Liked by 1 person

  28. I find myself stressing about all of these things but when reading them like this it makes me think how ridiculous it was to stress about it.

    Liked by 1 person

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