* Stop Trying to Let it go

May 18, 2015

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Inspirations, Love, middle ground, Mindfulness, Self Discovery

In a conversation with my friend Rikki the other day we talked about lessons from dogs. I hope you are listening Paul and Pharaoh over at Learning from Dogs

“Letting go” came up and Rikki noticed how there is a difference between a dog giving over a toy or ball, compared with a dog who is told to “let it go”.

What comes to mind when you think about what you would like to let go of? Its likely to be about letting go of trying to control things that are not within your control right?!?

… Like changing the personality of a colleague or partner… or letting go of trying to do everything perfectly … or letting go of taking on so much… or letting go of resentment because things didn’t go your way.

Take a note of whatever comes to mind right now.

Now notice your mindset or attitude. Do you sense resistance to letting this go? Perhaps there are judging thoughts about how its not possible, stupid…. This is your ego thinking rebelling to the idea of not being in control. This thinking comes from fear.

Remember your thinking is not the truth.

Now imagine the dog who comes over and gives you their precious toy. In giving it over, the inner mindset shifts from one of resistance to one of openness and giving. This comes from love.

The next time you want to let it go, come from your heart and give it over.

And say thank you ❤️

44 responses to “* Stop Trying to Let it go”

Hariod Brawn

May 18, 2015 at 9:00 am

Nice try Val, but ain’t no one gettin’ my tennis ball! 😉 Seriously though, this is a very beautiful way of thinking of relinquishment, and associating the whole with the loving, open way in which our pet dogs invite us to play is a delightful way of embedding the matter in memory.

Hariod Federuff, or is it Boris Barker? ❤

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1. Val Boyko
  
  May 18, 2015 at 9:16 am
  
  Hahaha! Thanks for adding this perspective H! … I’m a fan of Boris Barker 😎
  
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Robert Jepson

May 18, 2015 at 9:35 am

Fear of letting go emanates from the ego as it tries to control the external world, and generally fails, causing unhappiness. We can only change ourselves, then perhaps the world, or part of it, may follow. And if it doesn’t, so what? Any concern there is down to …. the ego proclaiming ‘my way is right!’

We cannot force love upon the world, but if we demonstrate and live joy and love, it is infectious! Our dear animal friends show us the way 🙂

When we truly understand this reality and begin to overcome the ego, we start to relinquish the futile act of trying to change others or the world. Then life’s problems melt away.

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1. Val Boyko
  
  May 18, 2015 at 10:59 am
  
  Thank you Robert for bringing in the ego perspective! When we live from a place of love and oneness fear and ego diminish.
  
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Amy

May 18, 2015 at 9:47 am

This is such a great analogy and so true.

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1. Val Boyko
  
  May 18, 2015 at 11:00 am
  
  Thank you Amy!
  
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nrhatch

May 18, 2015 at 10:33 am

Resist hanging on
Attachments become anchors
Let billow your sails

Embrace all with joy
Relinquish with joy also
Learn to flow through life

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1. Val Boyko
  
  May 18, 2015 at 11:01 am
  
  Billow your sails with love Nancy 😍
  Love this!
  
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dianasschwenk

May 18, 2015 at 11:34 am

Dogs love you no matter what – what a great example! ❤
Diana xo

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1. Val Boyko
  
  May 18, 2015 at 1:49 pm
  
  Thanks Diana … although I do have one who doesn’t give over easily. It works when I give her lots of love and treats. 🙂
  
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  1. dianasschwenk
    
    May 18, 2015 at 7:03 pm
    
    haha, sounds like he has a ‘cat’ personality!
    
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    1. Val Boyko
      
      May 18, 2015 at 7:45 pm
      
      She is a terrier … an unexpected different kettle of fish 😉
      
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suzicate

May 18, 2015 at 12:03 pm

My dog pushes toys at us but won’t let go….guess I better not act like that though I admit I give things over I take back at later dates. I need to learn not to revisit these things unless it truly is in my best interest such as reiterating a lesson I should have learned.

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1. Val Boyko
  
  May 18, 2015 at 1:52 pm
  
  I hear you Suzi. Our best interest usually come from our heart when we tune into it ❤️
  
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Paul Handover

May 18, 2015 at 2:16 pm

Val, thank you so much for the mention. Picking up on the comment left by Diana, and implied by others, dogs are an incredible example of unconditional love. Not in every single animal but in a proportion so way ahead of us dear humans!

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1. Val Boyko
  
  May 18, 2015 at 8:04 pm
  
  Absolutely agree with you Paul. 🐾
  
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Healing Grief

May 18, 2015 at 8:52 pm

Yes I can see how I have held on throughout the years. When I learned to let go, it wasn’t as difficult as I first thought! Great analogy. 🙂

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1. Val Boyko
  
  May 19, 2015 at 12:57 pm
  
  Thank you Karen 🙂
  
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David Kanigan

May 18, 2015 at 9:09 pm

Or just let it flow, let it flow.

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1. Val Boyko
  
  May 19, 2015 at 7:33 am
  
  You got it!
  
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Eliza Waters

May 19, 2015 at 10:17 pm

Love this, Val. It’s a good way of looking at it. (We have so much to learn from dogs!)

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1. Val Boyko
  
  May 20, 2015 at 7:17 am
  
  Thanks Eliza. Yep – our dogs show us so much 🐾
  
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Kate @ Did That Just Happen?

May 20, 2015 at 9:01 am

Wow, great lesson. I need the reminder sometimes that it’s my ego and I can release and be happy! 🙂

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1. Val Boyko
  
  May 20, 2015 at 5:07 pm
  
  Coming from love is always the answer Kate 🙂 Thanks for stopping by!
  
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Tiny

May 20, 2015 at 4:18 pm

A great reminder, Val! I’m sure I’ll “see” the tennis ball next time I’m holding onto something I shouldn’t 🙂

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1. Val Boyko
  
  May 20, 2015 at 5:13 pm
  
  Nice!
  
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anitaozolins

May 24, 2015 at 9:00 pm

Letting go is massive for me. I am trying to let go of my Mums possessions, her handbag is one thing I can’t let go of. It sounds weird right? But its true. It was so personal for her. I can dedicate a whole post to it! I will be! 🙂 Love your blog, it all looks great. xx

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Runaway Nuns and Leprechauns

May 25, 2015 at 11:03 pm

Letting go is such a source of freedom and peace. Although I have not completely mastered the art I am always mindful of these facts and always willing to try.
Thank you for being such an inspiration Val.

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1. Val Boyko
  
  May 26, 2015 at 3:06 pm
  
  Thank you for sharing here. I appreciate it 😊
  
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Jennifer’s Journal

May 27, 2015 at 2:35 pm

What a perfect analogy, Val. Dogs give of themselves so willingly. At least most of the ones I know do. 🙂

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1. Val Boyko
  
  May 27, 2015 at 4:28 pm
  
  You must know some lovely dogs Jennifer 🙂 Thank you for stopping by and commenting!
  
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Friday Bouquet #23 | Jennifer's Journal

Jun 5, 2015 at 11:25 am

[…] Stop Trying to Let it Go […]

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rebeccabeckam4wxo

Jun 5, 2015 at 11:35 am

Reblogged this on Positive Thoughts Positive Life 4 Everyone and commented:
This is just wonderful…Thank You

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1. Val Boyko
  
  Jun 5, 2015 at 3:05 pm
  
  Thank you Rebecca! So glad you enjoyed it. xo
  
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Carrie Rubin

Jun 5, 2015 at 1:04 pm

Many of us spend far too much time and energy worrying about things out of our control. This is a great reminder of the importance of letting it go. (Came this way via Jennifer’s Journal. Lovely post!)

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1. Val Boyko
  
  Jun 5, 2015 at 3:06 pm
  
  I’m with you on this Carrie! May we all keep reminding ourselves along the way 😉
  
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  1. Carrie Rubin
    
    Jun 5, 2015 at 3:32 pm
    
    🙂
    
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Minuscule Moments

Jun 5, 2015 at 3:47 pm

Enjoyed reading this wonderful post Val, sent over by Jennifer and look forward to following along and reading some more soon. Kath.

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1. Val Boyko
  
  Jun 5, 2015 at 5:18 pm
  
  Thank you Kath for stopping by! I look forward to more connections with you 😎
  
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dianasschwenk

Jun 5, 2015 at 9:07 pm

Loved it the first time and loving it again today having come here via Jennifer. ❤
Diana xo

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1. Val Boyko
  
  Jun 6, 2015 at 7:25 am
  
  Thanks Diana. So good to see you twice today! 😉
  
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mewhoami

Jun 19, 2015 at 1:21 pm

Well said, and once we let go of whatever it is, we will feel so much better. The weight lifted is very freeing. Came over from Jennifer’s Journal and look forward to reading more from you. 🙂

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1. Val Boyko
  
  Jun 19, 2015 at 1:56 pm
  
  Hi WhoamI! Thank you for stopping by and the follow. I look forward to more connections and inspirations with you 🙂
  
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  1. mewhoami
    
    Jun 19, 2015 at 3:15 pm
    
    It is my pleasure!
    
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