This is a repost for all those struggling with pain and forgiveness. When the pain eases we can see more clearly.
If I were to ask you “Do you go around inflicting pain on to others?”
Most of you would answer with a vehement NO!
That’s because the idea of being a mean person or a bully is simply not acceptable to us. We cannot see ourselves in contradiction to our beliefs and values. Its our protective ego that cannot face the possibility. It holds on strong to its belief about how we appear in the world… and what is acceptable to ourselves.
Yet, when we take time to pause and reflect, most of us do unintentionally inflict pain on others.
Consider if you have done any of these:
Not seen someone who wants to be acknowledged.
Forgetting to call.
Making judgments.
Withholding.
Getting distracted.
Being late.
Withdrawing.
Holding on to resentment.
Sticking to a particular way of doing things.
Stonewalling.
Acting out in anger.
Holding on to your beliefs.
All of these actions can cause pain for others.
We may tell ourselves its not our fault or we are protecting ourselves. After all, it may not be our intention to cause pain. However, the outcome is, that we do.
In the same way, we feel pain when others act in this way towards us.
How many times have you felt hurt by someone because of one or more of the above actions?
It is the nature of human beings to be egocentric and self protective. And when we are, we are capable of inflicting pain on others. We are all imperfectly human – no matter how hard we try to be perfectly in control.
When we accept this, we can begin to forgive ourselves and others. This is a huge step on life’s journey to finding real peace of mind.
Follow this link to a Forgiveness Meditation which will guide you towards forgiveness and peace.
After all, we are only human. Despite our failings we are also filled with love … and a capacity to forgive.