This is a (provocative) post for women, mothers, sisters and wives.
What if this is the time to let our sons, husbands, partners, colleagues, brothers, and adult children … find their own way?
In this stay-at-home working mother era, how many more times do you want to hear: “Where is the …?” “What have you done with my …?” “What’s for dinner?” …”What do we need at the store?”…
It seems to be such a habit for most of us to jump in to solve, find, soothe and show the way to support our males and children. We tell ourselves: “they need us”… “what would they do without us”… “we are good at this”… And we keep serving them and making sure their needs are met.
Isn’t it time for a shift in attitude and perspective? If you are tired, frazzled and feel out of balance, then the answer is absolutely YES.
You may be happy (to a point) to have your adult children home, but its up to you to set the guidelines and educate them about their role in this new family state. Reverting to the old ways doesn’t work any more, especially if you are the mother.
Here are some questions to ask yourself:
“Am I contributing to old fashioned patriarchal habits from an earlier generation?”
Or consider “Why is it okay for the kids to disturb me rather than daddy when he is in his office?”
“What am I teaching my children about taking responsibility… equality… independence… speaking up?”
This is an opportunity to create a new era of true equality and get Mankind and Childrenkind to step up to support one another and the family.
To the women out there staying at home, does this ring true? Is there more pressure than ever for you to take on the role to support and ensure your menfolk and children feel comforted and loved? Are you depleting yourself by spending more time soothing and ensuring their needs are being met? And are you receiving the comfort and love that you want? Are you truly taking care of yourself? Are you getting your own needs met?
My heart goes out to you.
What if you let them find their own way and you gave yourself the time, space and nurturing that you desperately need.
Step back from taking care of everyone else. Instead of letting resentment build, speak up from your heart, and come to a new agreement on shared responsibilities at home.
Do this for yourself. For them. For the new future ahead.
This is not about making our country like the past, its about building a new future, and it begins with each one of us at home.